Time To Sit

It's what I need. Just time to sit and chat.

 About a year and a half ago. I had this dream that I wanted to fulfill of making handcrafted soaps and scrubs. Artisan types. It was something that I had been interested in for years, but I just never pursued it. I have dabbled with it back and forth over the past year. Even have changed my logo. I am now enjoying spending time every day building what I hope to be a steady business. It gives me a great out from the everyday. Helps take my mind off of things from time to time. What is great too is I don't stress over it. I can get up and work on it and take a break and repeat.

I did my very first show this past weekend. Weather was great and it gave me the perfect opportunity to do a run through. I know am ready for a farmer's market.

I have had horrible ulcers the past few weeks. Reflux in the middle of the night, and a cold that I cannot shake. The family just needs to wake up, say one "bless you" then be on with their day. I have used the heating pad on my back every night I go to sleep and I get some relief there. My back feels shingly right now. I am going to go back to eliminating the gluten from my diet. I may not be seeking treatment through a doctor right now, but I am going to lean on a little western medicine. It's been a year since I did my 18 day fruits and veggie fast. While I'm not ready to give meat up just yet, I will probably start preparing for the fast. I prepackaged a bunch of fruits and veggies for my "green drinks". Perhaps one a day. Detox baths and rest. I just need rest. I CRAVE rest right now. I just can't. I see everything that needs to be done and rest just isn't in the equation. Lyme + type A personality + big family = no rest.....
Now with the holidays, those chances go down even further. Boo whoooo.

Off to make 5 tutu's for some very precious teenage girls for halloween.
Adrienne

Houston "Insert cliche here"

I have hit a complete road block in my fight. I have chosen not to continue with treatment. This was not a hasty decision and my husband really tried to talk me out of it, but ultimately it is my choice.  I don't fight the bad days anymore. I rest. Good days still require some rest. I am tired. I am broken. I am trying to just make the best out of what ever I can. The stresses that my everyday life have brought on in conjunction with being ill has made it so very counterproductive. I cannot keep up with both and it seems the only thing I do have control over is my choice.  I am finding it easier to just sit back and let everything run its course.

Something in the Air

Today's entry is brought to you by sheer frustration and a free ride with me on the Pity Train. Yes, there is something in the air this past week. It's going from 104 degrees to low 80's. NOT a Lymie's friend. I spent a lot of last week crying and laying around in bed. Even on Friday during my gym session I managed to run off to the locker room not once, but twice to cry. The sense of myself losing control over my neuro side sucks. Small twitches, muscle myalgia, freezing body temps, and the sleep. I cannot get enough sleep.  We had been on vacation with friends where the temps were warm and the sun was shining. I wanted to sleep. Even felt like the flu a few times. (Classic herx onset.)  As the low pressure systems and the fronts have all shifted, so have my bones.

I'm not really sure where my energy comes from these days. I have started taking on more projects and trying to be positive. I work out quite regularly, run more errands, try to just be more involved than what I have been allowed to be over the past year.  It takes a lot of digging deep.  I haven't been on any of my medications except for my nighttime dose of gabapentin and the occasional Tylenol. The past week though, I can't get enough hot epsom baths.  I also discovered through one of my Lyme groups that drinking Alka Seltzer Gold helps with the herxing. The sodium bicarbonate in it helps raise the PH levels in the body. I'm not sure of the science of this all and I'm also not sure if this is a mind over matter deal, but either way, I seem to get some relief.

We took in Chung Do, a foreign exchange student from Vietnam.  He came to live with us just at a month ago. It's been easier than I thought explaining to him when "Mom isn't having a good day".  He seems to understand and when I ask him if he understands he just says, "Yes, because of your Lyme Disease."
Lyme is universal.  I was able to pull up some information on it that he would understand.

I see the doc in a few weeks. It will be my first visit to him since April.

No such thing as Chronic Lyme some say......I wish I say.